Category: General Interest

In my last post here, I wrote about my son’s extreme pickiness with many, many foods. It has been a real challenge for my husband and I over these past 4 years but I can now say that there is no greater joy than witnessing when big a payoff happens.

We had that moment last week when my Mother In-Law was visiting us for the week. We decided to do what we always do in the summer on Wednesday nights – go to the farmer’s market, have a picnic and watch a free outdoor concert.

What is my son Leif’s favorite food at the market? Fresh baked bread. We get him a whole wheat sourdough baguette every week and he happily munches on it as we buy our fruits and veggies. Since he hasn’t ever eaten a sandwich, I’ve given up on asking or making suggestions about it.

When we were done shopping, we laid out our picnic blanket, started eating all of our different items we brought with us as well as some of what we purchased there and then we see a little boy next to us with what looked like a cold grilled cheese sandwich in his hand. The boy looked to be about 18 months old and was eating his quarter of a sandwich near Leif. My husband says, “Look at that little boy eating a sandwich, wouldn’t you like to eat a sandwich, too?” Leif by then was eating his all time favorite protein food – organic, uncured turkey bologna, rolled up. To our surprise Leif said, “Sure.”

“What?!” We all looked at each other in amazement and I said, “Ok, I am going to put your turkey bologna inside this chunk of bread and showed him what I did and he took the sandwich from me with two hands and took a big bite. We three cheered and clapped and high five’d him. He was giggling over the big production we were making out of this momentous moment. My Mother In-Law even took a photo of this (which sadly I don’t have yet).

When he was done with that one little mini sandwich, he wanted another. We sat there until he was done eating a second and much bigger sandwich and then we went over to the concert where he and I danced a lot to a great band and I told him several times how proud I was of him for trying the sandwich and how happy Daddy and I were that he likes sandwiches now. So much joy we all felt that night!

I was hoping this wasn’t just a fluke so the next day I offered to make him a sandwich on the bread we had at home and he agreed to it – even with some lettuce on it (but nothing else). Wow. Eating three different items altogether – unheard of. He eats half of a whole sandwich now every day since that night. All week for camp this is what he’s wanted for lunch and eats all of it. I’m still amazed watching him eat a sandwich. I can’t wait until he says “sure” about eating a nut butter and jam sandwich or even wanting to sleep in his own room finally. Now I really know it will be coming and maybe sooner than I think.

This really proves to us that once again, our gentle, AP techniques we’ve been using really pay off well. For a child that says, “I don’t like it” for so many foods even if he’s never tasted it to all of a sudden say “sure” instead is amazing. When they are ready, they embrace it and make it their own with ease.

Written by Melissa from Nature Deva.

Check out this week’s other Wordless Wednesday submissions. Want to see us feature a picture of your little cutie on API Speaks next Wednesday? Email Julie.

“A good night’s sleep” is a phrase I hear often in my house. Since our 18 month old enjoys a good night’s sleep most every night, it isn’t from her mouth that I hear the phrase (even if she could say it). Sometimes it is me making an excuse about why I felt unmotivated to get this or that done: “Oh, if I’d only had a good night’s sleep, then I would’ve . . .” But, more often I hear the phrase from my husband. We discuss family planning. This is never a good idea after we have not had a “good night’s sleep.” And, I’m learning, it isn’t a good idea to bring up family planning when my husband has had an overwhelming day at the office. On his more stressful days, he becomes passionate when the topic of sleep comes up: “I haven’t had a good night’s sleep in a year and half.” Annabelle giggles at him as though she knows exactly what he is saying. I try to hold back a smile (because our wakeful little girl is cute and has stolen my heart completely, sleep or no sleep). And then, together my husband and I share a moment adoring our daughter and I know we’re both thinking, “Isn’t she worth it?”

To be honest, we are sometimes sleep deprived. But for the most part, I know that I rack up a decent night’s sleep and am able to make up for lost sleep during the day, with my daughter napping beside me. I realize that my husband doesn’t have that option. He’s not your regular George Costanza, crawling under his desk to get some shut eye. But, my husband is one of those blessed people who sleeps through storms, probably air bombs, and definitely through the wakings of a teething toddler. What then are his less than “good night’s sleep”? I am guessing those are the nights when I, the ever waking mom, startle him from his sleep and beg for mercy from our daughter. Annabelle nurses through her teething pain, and after a few hours, non-stop breastfeeding is uncomfortable for me, not to mention difficult to sleep through.

Right now we are at a stand still. Annabelle falls asleep in her crib and remains there for several hours until her first waking. Once she is awake, I nurse her or my husband soothes her and she goes back to sleep in her crib. On other nights, she demands a place beside her mom and dad in our family bed. We all wake up together in our bed just about every morning.

My husband, meanwhile, outlines his plans for successfully making it through the entire night with our daughter sleeping in her crib. In the back of his mind, I know he wants to spend more time with me, more time playing pool, and more time just well, sleeping in.

The way I see our sleeping arrangement is that our daughter will gradually become more comfortable sleeping away from her parents, but that it is our job to encourage her trust in her parents as well as her own self-confidence by staying with her through the night, reassuring her that we are there for her no matter what.

And my husband agrees with my point of view, the latter part anyway. He is a most devoted and doting father. I observe the two of them walking together and playing. His voice changes when he speaks with her; he becomes a younger, more carefree version of himself. Even his body language loosens up. He no longer thinks about what is going on at his office, what deadlines are up, etc. He focuses entirely on his daughter.
So I asked him one night, “Do you think that your bond with Annabelle has anything to do with co-sleeping? I mean, think about it. You go to work all day and don’t see Annabelle. Yeah, you have some time with her at night, but just think about how many hours you two spend together sleeping, not to mention how you play together when you wake up in the morning.”

My husband fights a smile. “Maybe I’m just a good father?” he says. He hates to admit that he could ever be wrong about something, but maybe, just maybe, he senses an inkling of truth when it comes to how co-sleeping has benefited his relationship with our daughter.

For those of you who are co-sleeping or are considering co-sleeping, below are several articles addressing dads’ concerns about co-sleeping, the positive effects of co-sleeping with our children, and how to co-sleep safely:

• API’s Safe Sleep Guidelines
• API’s Nighttime Parenting Resources
• Dr. Sears’ Sleeping Safely with your baby
• Brand New Dad Co-sleeping thread
• Wears the Baby Ask Dad responds to question about co-sleeping

Don’t forget to check out today’s other Wordless Wednesday submissions!

For those of you who are keen on sewing, yet are not familiar with a sewing machine, first should gain proficiency with the entirety of the essentials with a straightforward sort of sewing machine and from that point, you can advance to one that is further developed. Attempting to sew when you are not accustomed to it tends to be very ungainly and badly arranged for anybody to stay there and start pushing on the foot pedal. In any case, there are some that are moderate and for a tenderfoot.

One of the initial moves towards figuring out how to sew is for you to think about sewing, similar to what a bobbin and a weighted foot and furthermore a mobile foot are. As a rule, the sewing machine was constantly present in a greater part of homes wherever for a long time and is a serious supportive instrument at whatever point it comes to sewing.

Once in the past, the sewing machine innovation was not especially advanced. Just a customary sort of was utilized by individuals for sewing garments. In any case, as innovation propelled it likewise contributed towards these machines as well. Today there are such huge numbers of various highlights and usefulness. A genuine amateur may become befuddled while picking one that is for fledglings. For any individual who is searching for one that is useful for apprentices, best sewing machine for beginners 2019 can help you to buy the best sewing machine.

With respect to any sort of other hardware, before you choose to buy one, you will be required to know exactly why you are getting one. Recording your essential explanations behind why you truly need one will assist you with choosing the best sewing machine that suits you as indicated by the entirety of your necessities and your needs.

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Should you be a tenderfoot then you will need to remain with a low spending plan. You will have the option to discover some with great highlights at extreme ease. For learners, it is a smart thought for you to stay with a fundamental sort and not an increasingly mind-boggling one.

There are numerous brands and types that are only incredible for amateurs. At the point when you are all set out and purchase a one, you will need to go to a hardware shop and request that the sales rep show one of them for you, so along these lines, you will know exactly what it will take for you to work it.

This week, I’ve been struggling with what it means to be a parent-activist. Because, whether we call ourselves activists or not, that’s part of what comes with the territory when you choose to parent outside the mainstream. Some of that is good–I love it when someone approaches me with compliments or questions about my Baby Hawk carrier, or when someone comments appreciatively on the way I (try to) gently handle my son’s tantrums. I love that I have become a breastfeeding resource not just to my local support group members, but to my friends and family.

But where I struggle is with the uphill battle API faces as an organization committed to challenging, and eventually changing, society’s perception of what the parent-child bond should look like from punitive and controlling to loving, empathic, and respectful. As a relatively new member of the API Volunteer Staff, I catch myself looking at things through rose-colored glasses: if we’ve got intuition and research on our side, AP should be an easy sell!

However, as with any grassroots organization that is trying to affect major cultural change, we have a lot of work ahead of us if we want Attachment Parenting to be a household name.

Every day, as API educates parents about safe sleep practices that promote bonding and breastfeeding–two of Dr. Sears’ original Baby Bs–there are organizations who use fear to motivate families to isolate their children in a crib in a separate room from parents. Every day, as organizations like Lamaze International, API, and BOLD attempt to spread the word about making educated decisions about birth, some members of the medical community attempt to pass resolutions to limit a family’s choices to hospital birth.

These are just two examples of the challenges we face. But, to remind everyone that progress is being made, I’d like to share two little victories:

The first, if you can stand the video and audio being out of sync, is a wonderful video in which Phyllis Diller, fantastic funny lady behind the voices of many children’s cartoon characters–including the Queen in A Bug’s Life, speaks out on the importance of breastfeeding.

She shares her experience of breastfeeding six children (sadly, only five survived infancy), of feeding her NICU baby pumped milk, and her vision that mothers be willing and allowed to take a year off of work after birth so that they can form the important bond of breastfeeding their child. Well done Phyllis!

The second is an article by Tabi Upton of the Chattanooga Times Free Press entitled Parenting Strategies Today, which features Attachment Parenting. Although I do not know the name of the API member who is referenced in this story, I want to thank you–today you were a parent-activist for API, perhaps even without meaning to be, and you not only made a difference, but you made my day!

Don’t forget to check out the other Wordless Wednesday submissions.

We have had more volunteers step up to help API further our mission of educating and supporting “all parents in raising secure, joyful, and empathic children in order to strengthen families and create a more compassionate world” and for that we are incredibly grateful! We seek to offer more innovative and creative ways to educate and support families across the world but continue to need volunteers to help make that happen.

Recently one of our API Support Group Leaders sent a note to all of her support group members and gave us permission to reprint it here. Also, be sure to check out this month’s volunteer position “highlight” at the end of this post. Who knows, we might just have something that’s right up your alley! We’d love to have you join our attached “team” of volunteers!

Volunteer Spotlight – Meet Dedra

I have always believed that volunteering was important. It connects us to other humans, increases our compassion, and allows us to give back to our communities. I have volunteered in various ways throughout my life and I’ve always wanted to set a good example of volunteering for my children.

However, I have found that it’s not so easy to volunteer and practice attachment parenting at the same time. My children would probably not be so welcome in a nursing home. They would make it very difficult to help out in a soup kitchen. I just have not found too many opportunities in which my children could participate.

Becoming involved with Attachment Parenting International has provided a solution. It flows naturally from my parenting style because my children can be by my side. As an API Support Group Leader, not only do I give back to my community, I get to learn more about this compassionate style of parenting. My children reap the benefits of what I put into it tenfold. Because of my position, I am diligently reading all I can about the best parenting practices and am using my research to improve my own skills as a mother and a wife.

There are so many opportunities at API. They need copy editors, book reviewers, foreign language consultants, website contributors, and much, much more.

You can contribute at your own level of comfort. If you can give a lot of time, wonderful. If not, that is appreciated, too. And if you have a family issue and need to step back for a while, who better to understand than API? Maintain Personal and Family Balance is one of the Eight Principles!

Volunteer Position Highlight – Retail Affiliate Coordinator

We are very excited about a new program that we’d like to get off of the ground. API is working on a Retail Affiliates Program and are in need of an enthusiastic individual interested in finding businesses and individuals to be a part of it. This coordinator will work together with API’s Business Management Director to create a comprehensive business plan. Once the program has been fully developed, they will seek and contact Attachment Parenting supportive individuals and businesses to establish a mutually beneficial relationship. The Retail Affiliate Program will ultimately give businesses additional exposure while assisting API with an additional source of revenue. If you are interested and excited about creating a new, comprehensive and exciting revenue generating program, this may be the position for you. Please contact me to request a job description and further details, I look forward to hearing from you!

If you believe in the value of our mission to educate and support all parents in raising secure, joyful, and empathic children in order to strengthen families and create a more compassionate world, please join with us today. Click here http://www.attachmentparenting.org/help/help_vol.php for more information on the various volunteer positions that our organization currently has available. Please know that this list is not comprehensive. If you have talents and experience that you feel would further our mission, please email me so that we can chat about the possibilities!

Warmly,
Brandy Lance