Author: API Blog

APtly Said, Formerly API Speaks launched in April of 2008 as part of Attachment Parenting International's larger effort to offer interactive content through their newly-redesigned web site: http://www.attachmentparenting.org. All contributors to APtly Said, as with so many of API's staff, are volunteers who donate their time and energy to promote Attachment Parenting world wide.

AP Month 2020: Parenting with PEACE

October is AP Month!

Parenting with PEACE

The magic of positive childhood experiences

AP Month logo

API invites you to join us in encouraging positive childhood experiences to foster resilience and well-being.

Understand more about the importance of positive childhood experiences by understanding ACES – adverse childhood experiences.

How’s your ACES score and your resilience score?

An API interview with the founder of ACES Connection, Jane Stevens.

Check out the Evolved Nest’s 28-Day Baby Care Campaign.

Check out API’s leader preparation resource for hosting a group in your area

Follow us on API Links and APtly Said for 31 days of Parenting with PEACE.

Add your family to our Photo Wall to celebrate this month.

Share and inspire families with your family’s positive parenting story.

Keep in touch and share AP Month with friends on Facebook.

Community Means Cherishing One Another: API is here for you.

 

Anieken Udofia mural of diverse group of children watering garden togetherOur days are filled with compassion–and passion–as our world grows in awareness, shares, speaks out, and supports change for equity and justice for our Black families. We are moved by generations of families, fathers, mothers, children, together acting to examine and make systemic change against racism.

Making a change is a road fraught with failures and doubts, including for parenting decisions and actions. In the midst of that, practicing sensitivity, connection, and understanding and nurturing others, including our own children, is also immeasurably rewarding. The ultimate key to navigating the challenges and ensuring the immediate and long-term change is support. Taking time, becoming vulnerable, reaching out, and finding, or even creating, support may be the most difficult and most important effort we make.

That’s why we’re here to help you find support, help you offer support if you can provide it, help you connect and make change–at home, in your community, and in our world. We can work and support each other to change how we parent and through it, even reform the disparities that exist in our communities.

API has many resources on talking with your children about racism, the effects of racism, and more – selected from thoughtful and informed parenting leaders. Use them in your home, in your support group meetings, and in your community. We will continue to add to this resource and invite you to share your Attachment Parenting resources as well.

Text Choose Compassion overlaid on drawing of outstretched hands

At this time that we are still sheltering, and as families face new waves of COVID-19 outbreak around the world, we continue to manage children’s disappointments, expectations, and agendas.

 

We invite you to let us know how YOU are doing through two surveys:

For parent group leaders, our leader survey will help us support you and give you the tools you need to serve your community.

If you’re a parent, we would very much like to hear from you too. How are you doing? Let us know by completing this 1 minute parent survey so we can provide support that fits best.

Only by reaching out to one another, by being honest with ourselves and with each other about how we’re doing, can we work toward communal health and the healing of social rifts.

Now is the time to lean on one another. API is here for you. 

BabyBabyOhBaby video resources courtesy of Stark Productions for API to support families, free of charge through the end of September!

API is grateful to Stark Productions for thinking of families at home at this time and providing resources to help us nurture, connect, and help foster secure attachment.

Please read more about these amazing videos and the making of them at Babybabyohbaby.com, and enjoy them at no cost to you:

BabyBabyOhBaby Breastfeeding

BabyBabyOhBaby Infant Massage – with chapters, and downloadable stroke guide

BabyBabyOhBaby Infant Massage – Just Music and Babies (Accompaniment / Downloadable)

Bonus feature: Parents find that their babies love watching the the babies!

 

These videos are created in memory of Beatrice Stark, the producer’s mother.

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If you’re thinking about breastfeeding, BabyBabyOhBaby: Nurturing Your Gorgeous & Growing Baby By Breastfeeding will make your decision much easier. If you’ve already decided to breastfeed—and we hope you have—our video takes the mystery and doubt out of breastfeeding by giving you practical, real-world information.

Our panel of experts are all real moms and babies who show and tell you what to expect. Much more than a how-to film, BabyBabyOhBaby: Breastfeeding is a heartfelt, honest and reliable introduction to one of the very best parts of motherhood.

This video is a practical guide to breastfeeding. It is not a substitute for medical advice. If you have questions or difficulties, consult a La Leche League volunteer, your health care provider or an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant.

BabyBabyOhBaby Breastfeeding

 

“BabyBabyOhBaby: Bonding With Your Brilliant & Beautiful Baby Through Infant Massage” is an entertaining and informative introduction to infant massage, providing a step by step guide with chapters devoted to each part of the body, easy to follow demonstrations, and “real world” examples of mothers and fathers practicing these ancient techniques with their own babies.

Infant massage is a loving way to communicate with your baby, to bond and build trust and confidence for both baby and parent. When you give your baby a massage, you’re showing them just how much you love them, one stroke at a time. By introducing your beautiful baby to the joys and benefits of massage during infancy you’re giving a gift that can last a lifetime.

This video is a practical guide to infant massage. It is not medical advice. You should review your massage program with your doctor before beginning. Infant massage is not medical treatment or therapy. If your baby shows signs of discomfort or distress during the massage, STOP. Consult with your doctor prior to resuming.

BabyBabyOhBaby Infant Massage – with chapters, and downloadable stroke guide

BabyBabyOhBaby Infant Massage – Just Music and Babies (Accompaniment / Downloadable)

 

The Little Gnome Who Had to Stay Home – A Story Medicine Tale To Share with Our Children

This story was written by Susan Perrow for use with young children (suggested ages 3-5 years) who are required to stay home during the current COVID-19 pandemic, or who have had their freedom severely modified (e.g. perhaps they can attend school but can’t attend special assemblies, festivals, parties or events).

The song at the end has been left open for teachers and parents to create more verses with ideas from the children. The story can be changed/edited to suit different situations – e.g. mother tree could be father tree or grandmother or grandfather tree, or you may want to omit the part about ‘gnome school’. The main character could also be changed (e.g. instead of using a gnome the story could be about a mouse stuck in his little house, or a bird that must stay and rest in the nest).

The Little Gnome Who Had to Stay Home

Little gnome was confused.
Why did he have to stay home?
Didn’t everyone know how little gnomes love to roam!
He couldn’t go to gnome school, he couldn’t play with his friends in the forest, and his friends couldn’t visit him.
Little gnome was stuck in his tree-root home.
At least he could look out his window through the rocks and the tree roots. He was surprised that there was so much to see. Little ants were scurrying by, brightly coloured beetles were climbing up and down the fallen leaves and floppy eared rabbits were hopping in and out their burrows.
But even with all these things to watch, little gnome was growing impatient. Why did he have to keep on staying home? It didn’t make sense to him why he could not roam.
Then Mother Tree whispered to him:
‘Things are not as they used to be – but trust me – soon you will be free – trust me, trust me.’
Little gnome knew in his heart that he could always trust Mother Tree.
Mother Tree carried the wisdom of the whole forest!
Mother Tree knew all about everything. The birds and the wind were her friends and messengers.
They visited her every day sharing the news of the big wide world.
Little gnome could hear when the birds came by. He could hear them singing high up in the branches of Mother Tree.
Little gnome could see when the wind was visiting. He could see the branches swaying this way and that. He sometimes had to close his window to keep out the leaves and dust stirred up by this busy friend!
Everyday Mother Tree continued to whisper to him:
‘Things are not as they used to be – but trust me – soon you will be free – trust me, trust me.’
So little gnome had to trust, and little gnome had to wait. Soon he knew he would be free again to leave his home amongst the rocks and tree roots. Soon he knew he would be free to roam once again in the beautiful forest.
And while he waited, he was surprised how many things he could find to do in his cosy little tree root home.
Little gnome can dance
Little gnome can sing
Little gnome can paint and draw
And do somersaults across the floor.
Little gnome can dance
Little gnome can sing
Little gnome can clean and cook
And curl up with a picture book.
Little gnome can dance
Little gnome can sing
Little gnome can ………………………….
And ………………………………………………..
Little gnome can dance
Little gnome can sing
Little gnome can ………………………….
And ………………………………………………..
Little gnome can dance
Little gnome can sing
Little gnome can ………………………….
And ………………………………………………..

From the author:

I have chosen to write this story with a ‘mirroring’ structure – the story simply reflects the situation and expands upon it with images that help share a message that is too strong to state directly with little children. I haven’t promised any timeline because that would be irresponsible as no one knows it at this stage. The story’s aim is to encourage acceptance of the current ‘social distancing’ situation, and to help motivate the children to find and enjoy activities that they can do within the home.

For anyone new to ‘story medicine’, stories can help navigate the emotions that come with different kinds of loss and challenging situations. By allowing rather than resisting the truth, and by dressing it with the fabric of the imagination, stories can help the process of weaving the truth into everyday life, especially with young children.

This story will be included in the ‘loss of health and well-being’ section in my next book, entitled, ‘Stories to Light the Night: A Grief and Loss Collection for Children, Families and Communities’ (due to be published late 2020 by Hawthorn Press, UK) – the book will have more than 80 stories in different sections ….. stories for the loss of a loved one, loss of place, loss of family connection, loss of a pet, loss of health and well-being, loss of trust, and environmental grief and loss.

Printed with permission.

Thank you to Susan Perrow.

www.susanperrow.com

Welcome to AP Month 2018

Welcome to AP Month 2018!

This AP Month 2018 “Love Collective” theme reflects the possibilities we envision for Attachment Parenting in our society. Working as a collective–where we have a shared passion that we join together to address–is fitting for both AP Month 2018 and the new API we are excited to present.

This month we are sharing about, and motivated by, the value of the API Principles for well being of children and families, and working together to achieve the common objective of a more compassionate world. We believe we can work collectively–sharing our experiences and making parenting sweeter–to help more families than ever!

Follow us on APtly Said and API’s Facebook page to learn more and to catch all the announcements!