Naomi Aldort, author of Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves, discussed parental control in her post, Taming the Tiger Mother, for Life Learning Magazine.
Here is an excerpt from the piece, which appeared in the Ask Naomi column:
Q: I have read a great deal about Amy Chua, author of Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother – interviews on CNN and NPR, and in Oprah’s magazine; an article in Time; an excerpt from the book in the Wall Street Journal, and so on. Chua speaks of her superior Chinese parenting. Many people see her as abusive, but others think she puts much more into her children. I am feeling confused. I am here to give my children all that I can. If I give less than this “Tiger” mom does, it is because I think it is actually better to allow children to grow up on their own. But now I am not sure. We are unschooling, and my children fifteen, twelve, and nine, are not practicing anything. Are they missing something? Am I depriving them of accomplishing high ranks in society?
A: Any mother, Chinese or not, would abandon control and manipulation, if she knew kinder ways to raise a happy child who grows up into a loving, joyous, and accomplished adult. Chua would be very happy if her children would be fulfilling their own passions, without oppression. She would love to never have to coerce, yell, threaten, and make her home into “a war zone” (her words.) Only, she doesn’t know that this is possible.
Read Naomi’s post in its entirety: Taming the Tiger Mother.