Hello all! The AP forums have been so helpful to me in the past - I am once again needing some advice from like-minded people!
I have a 16-month-old daughter for whom I am the primary caregiver. My husband works out of town and is home on weekends. I've been practicing AP since she was born (despite much pressure to parent differently).
There are some things I would like - and need - to start doing for myself, such as going to the gym and going to a ladies class or church, however I have not done so until now because of the issue of leaving my daughter with child care providers at those locations. I want more than anything to preserve the precious bond she and I share and to ensure she does not feel frightened that I have abandoned her if I leave her to play.
At church, it is an option for me to take her to the service and this is what I have done. It is very distracting for me (I cannot concentrate on the lesson at all) and for the people around us, but I am happy to do this if it will ensure my daughter feels safe, comfortable, attached, etc. There is no option at the gym, therefore I have not gone since she was born. I do miss it and would enjoy going again.
Last Sunday I introduced her to the room that would be her play area and she reached out for the teacher without hesitation and began exploring the room. She is not having the separation anxiety responses she was having just a month ago. I do not want to push her before she is ready, and at the same time, I do not want to smother her if she is ready!
I also need advice on how to communicate to the teachers/care providers that if she does start crying and becoming unhappy, I want her brought to me right away. I know they are used to babies crying for their parents and they are also used to distracting them or allowing them to cry. Where is the balance for this and how do I explain AP in this setting?
Thanks so much!!!
Kenyon
I have a 16-month-old daughter for whom I am the primary caregiver. My husband works out of town and is home on weekends. I've been practicing AP since she was born (despite much pressure to parent differently).
There are some things I would like - and need - to start doing for myself, such as going to the gym and going to a ladies class or church, however I have not done so until now because of the issue of leaving my daughter with child care providers at those locations. I want more than anything to preserve the precious bond she and I share and to ensure she does not feel frightened that I have abandoned her if I leave her to play.
At church, it is an option for me to take her to the service and this is what I have done. It is very distracting for me (I cannot concentrate on the lesson at all) and for the people around us, but I am happy to do this if it will ensure my daughter feels safe, comfortable, attached, etc. There is no option at the gym, therefore I have not gone since she was born. I do miss it and would enjoy going again.
Last Sunday I introduced her to the room that would be her play area and she reached out for the teacher without hesitation and began exploring the room. She is not having the separation anxiety responses she was having just a month ago. I do not want to push her before she is ready, and at the same time, I do not want to smother her if she is ready!
I also need advice on how to communicate to the teachers/care providers that if she does start crying and becoming unhappy, I want her brought to me right away. I know they are used to babies crying for their parents and they are also used to distracting them or allowing them to cry. Where is the balance for this and how do I explain AP in this setting?
Thanks so much!!!
Kenyon
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