Hi! My LO is now five weeks. She has VERY certain ideas what she likes and doesnt. She is very different to DS (23 months) when he was so little and is fitting in so well.
I have a problem though. We have been AP since DS was born and love the person that he is turning into, we are happy with all of the choices we have made. DS loved being worn, co-sleeping etc.
DD however is very independent and easily overstimulated. She hates being worn (we have tried slings, mei-tais and wraps all in various configurations). Its the confinement, she also doesnt like being swaddled, she screams as though she is being murdered while straining against the wrap etc. She also has to be starfished when she sleeps so its making cosleeping difficult as she does not like anything touching her.
So, the problem is that with a toddler to also look after I feel like DD is not getting all the 'touch time' that she should be getting. Its simply impossible to do everything that needs doing while holding her in one arm. I dont let her cry or course and pick her up the moment she needs it.... but she is very happy to just stay in her hammock all day (not that she does, but you know what I mean). In the evenings when everything is done she sits in my arms while I watch TV/read and is happy - as long as she isnt being held too close. I just feel like she gets so little of me, but it seems to be what she prefers. Now of course when she is awake we talk with eachother and she is all happy and smiley.... but she cannot handle that for too long and starts crying needing somewhere quiet to unwind. She is just so different to DS who was inconsolable unless he was being held close and snug and who loved sound and light and excitement.
If we were wanting to do conventional parenting she would be a dream... but I cannot help but feel like I am neglecting her.
But she likes being hands off. What am I supposed to do when that seems to be what she wants? Isnt making her cry in arms when she would be happier out just as bad as letting her cry to be with you?
I'm lost.
I have a problem though. We have been AP since DS was born and love the person that he is turning into, we are happy with all of the choices we have made. DS loved being worn, co-sleeping etc.
DD however is very independent and easily overstimulated. She hates being worn (we have tried slings, mei-tais and wraps all in various configurations). Its the confinement, she also doesnt like being swaddled, she screams as though she is being murdered while straining against the wrap etc. She also has to be starfished when she sleeps so its making cosleeping difficult as she does not like anything touching her.
So, the problem is that with a toddler to also look after I feel like DD is not getting all the 'touch time' that she should be getting. Its simply impossible to do everything that needs doing while holding her in one arm. I dont let her cry or course and pick her up the moment she needs it.... but she is very happy to just stay in her hammock all day (not that she does, but you know what I mean). In the evenings when everything is done she sits in my arms while I watch TV/read and is happy - as long as she isnt being held too close. I just feel like she gets so little of me, but it seems to be what she prefers. Now of course when she is awake we talk with eachother and she is all happy and smiley.... but she cannot handle that for too long and starts crying needing somewhere quiet to unwind. She is just so different to DS who was inconsolable unless he was being held close and snug and who loved sound and light and excitement.
If we were wanting to do conventional parenting she would be a dream... but I cannot help but feel like I am neglecting her.
But she likes being hands off. What am I supposed to do when that seems to be what she wants? Isnt making her cry in arms when she would be happier out just as bad as letting her cry to be with you?I'm lost.
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