From personal experience, I was spanked as a kid - not a lot, but some. I thought it was pretty useless, as all it did was make me feel bad and my parents too, or so they'd say. I already knew they were displeased. I already felt bad about that. It didn't provide me any tools for how to better think through the next situation. When faced with a decision, I never thought hmm I might get spanked for this, and if I had that would have been a totally inappropriate reason for my decision.

As a mom, whenever I get the urge to spank, its purely out of exasperation and lack of "a plan" or creativity. I just can't think of an appropriate circumstance for spanking. Its not beneficial to teaching them how to think to "ensure" they feel bad about something. Yes they need to understand that actions have logicalor natural consequences and they ought to experience them when safe to do so, in addition to talking them through their feelings and actions and giving them "tools" to deal.

I dont think that spanking is ever "necessary" Nor do I believe its "harmless". What a great way to teach kids that violence is the answer and that pain or fear of it stops people from performing unwanted actions.

I was spanked and it never accomplished anything positive, thats for sure