At that weight, I'd say nothing is going to be comfortable for very long. You might try a sturdy woven wrap in a multi layered carry bbslen, hoppediz or anything made with a hemp or linen blend might work.

At that weight, I carried my kids in the Ergo on my back, but even in that one, it still took a toll on my back. I know a lot of people recommend the Ergo as their favorite carrier for kids, especially as they get bigger, but there comes a point when you have to say "when"! I had to...I consider myself someone who is in good physical shape, but still after my kids reached 40 pounds it was just too strenuous on my back to carry them anymore. It does make me sad to think that our baby wearing days are over.

And I don't mean to suggest that yours are, too, though! If you still can/ want to wear your toddler there still might be other carriers that work better for you than the Ergo. Some others that were recommended to me were:

Boba
Patapum toddler carrier
Babyhwak Oh Snap
a woven/ non-stretchy wrap
Kanga XT by Bloo Kangaroo

I'd recommend finding a local retailer that sells babywearing items, so you can try them on and have someone help you learn how to fit them correctly on you. Good luck!

Thank you both for your responses. Oh, I'm probably at the point when I should say "when" as well . . . and I probably just have a lot of sadness about that and was hoping that the miracle carrier was out there. I will check out some of the ones listed as a last ditch effort and then probably just make sure I carry her a lot to make myself feel better.

Thanks again!

That's so normal! I try to make up for missed babywearing with lots of extra snuggles & physical closeness ANYTIME I can get it in! I look for any & every chance to touch, hug, hold, massage, cuddle, etc. It helps.

at some point, i remember seeing this wedge thingy that you can strap to your hip. it just helps you hold your kid on your hip with your arm. you might do some combo of that and a maya wrap or something?

I don't think your bwing days have to be over. You just might have to wear your daughter for shorter periods of time. I wear my son who will be 3 in March and I love it. I find ways to wear him because he doesn't always want to, but we go for walks and he walks until he's tired and then I put him on my back. Now that we have deep snow I wear him on my back and we go snowshoeing. He goes on my back the whole time for that.

He's not as heavy as your DD, but he's 35 lbs, so still a heavy load. I use woven wraps and mei tais. For 43 lbs you would need one of the more supportive wraps and you would want to learn multi layer carries. If you're interested in that check out www.thebabywearer.com. I also like MTs because you tie them on which means you don't have fiddle with getting the buckles tight enough. I'm sure there are plent of SSCs like your ergo that would work too. With that much weight though you're probably not going to be super comfortable in anything, but you might be fine for short durations. You can also build up your strength and get to where you can go for longer periods.

Whatever carrier you use make sure you get her really high on your back and make sure you get the carrier nice and tight so she isn't leaning back away from you otherwise it's going to be harder on your back. Also make sure the seat of the carrier goes at least almost to her knees so it will be comfortable for her. The Boba has foot stirrups for her feet that will take some of the weight off her thighs if you think she will use them.

Good luck and let us know if you try it!

Kinderpack makes a carrier for preschoolers. http://www.kindercarry.com/pages/info.htm

Here is the info from their site:

preschool 20"h x 20" w- ages 3-5 yrs (starting at 35 lbs/38" tall)

Thanks everyone for your responses . . . connerleesmom, thanks for all your tips, enthusiasm, and optimism that I could still wear her. I really want to.

I have the Ergo, and I don't love the front straps that cuts across the chest. I have a large chest, and I'm plus-sized (blessing and a curse--I can wear a big kid because I'm big!), so it's just not that comfortable.

I lust after the Kindercarry preschool, but that seems like an impossible dream according to everything I've read. Any tips for landing one of those? Swap boards anywhere?

But I may just rework the Ergo and see if we can make it happen. I think Delaney would really enjoy it, and I know I would too.

Any other ideas, send 'em my way. And thank thanks thanks for your time and help. It's great to connect with other moms who are doing the same thing!
Corinne