I have a wonderful DS who will be 2 next week. We have co-slept and BF since birth. I have enjoyed BF him very much, but lately (last 4-5 mths) I have really been feeling a personal need to stop. Since my periods have returned, BF has become increasingly uncomfortable for me, and I often find myself dreading when he asks to nurse. This is especially true when he wakes in the night (anywhere from 3-6 times!) and will take nothing else but "mummy milk" to go back to sleep. Unfortunately, my milk supply has decreased, and the milk usually runs out long before he is done nursing, which means he is pacifying on me for anywhere from 30 mins-an hour in the wee hours of the morning. If I try to detach him, he kicks, screams, and cries until I give him back the "milks". Though I am not proud of it, I have become VERY frustrated with him, and have lost my temper, which usually results in me crying myself to sleep as he lays there and nurses.

I have tried to night wean him using the Jay Gordon technique, various "no-cry sleep" techniques, just cutting him off, using music as cues, giving milk in a cup, snacks (really great fun to make a snack at 3 am), giving him to my husband....and nothing has worked. After 2-3 hours of screaming, followed by usually a mere 1-2 hours of sleep before he wakes up screaming for milk again, I just figure that it's easier to just let him nurse; at least then I can be back to sleep within a reasonable time frame, and there is no crying. I don't know what to do. I don't like feeling angry with my son, and I know he senses this and it upsets him, which kills me with guilt. I want so badly to respond in a way that meets his needs, but I really don't know how much longer I can take this. I have been waiting and waiting for the self weaning to come, but he shows NO interest in giving up BF. None. Even during the day, I am sure that he would nurse all day if I let him (he still nurses between 3-4 times during the day). I sometimes find myself wishing that I had never breastfed him, which is so sad because I have always been such a huge proponent of BF and it has been such a great BF relationship before this point. It is starting to affect my relationship with my husband as well, as he thinks that DS is getting too old to BF, and that I should just say no to him and be done with it. I should note that any time I have tried this, it has resulted in tantrums and tears for both DS and I.

Has anyone else experienced this? What did you do? I really feel alone, as no one else I know has BF their child this long, and even the mums at a LLL meeting I attended couldn't believe that he still woke up to BF as much as he did. Sorry for the long post, and I appreciate any replies.

Thanks.