I need help. My 4 month old has been sleeping in my bed with me since birth. I had intended to use the "attached bed" but he had horrible reflux and would gag and choke when sleeping anywhere but propped up on my arm.

I really need him to sleep in the "attached bed" for 2 reasons.
1) My husband won't sleep in our bed for fear of squashing the baby between us.
2.) I'm a medical resident with overnight and beeper call responsiblities that will resume soon and if my baby is going to sleep he'll need to be in the "attached bed" so my husband can sleep in the bed next to him when I'm gone.

Now that he's finally his choking tendency I'm having a hard time getting him to accept the "attached bed" . He roots and bangs his head on the side trying to get closer to me despite how I try to reassure him. I've put my arm in the bed and my face on the side rail, I pat him and talk to him, but he just gets more and more frantic. I've read the sleep whisperer but the pick up put down methods seems almost as harsh as the Ferber method, almost like I'd be teasing him.

Please help. I welcome your suggestions