is there any way you can take him w/you? could your BF come w/you to help w/him?

I don't advise being separated extra just to "practice" separation. If anything, possibly spending more time together with your mother and your BF so his perception of them become firmly a secondary attachment. How often does he see them? Do you live with either of them? Will he be at your house while your gone?
What involvement does the BF have in nighttime parenting? Does he sleep near him? Will he tolerate his soothing?

I imagine if yr BF already watches him 4hrs a day, some good trust must of developed between them.
He will miss you sorely! Is there anyway he could come with your mother or BF and stay in the hotel with you? That would be ideal of course, but I know the limitations.

He may not need your milk while your away, but if you could pump a little while your gone, to assure good supply, it would be worth it! Even if you don't bother with pumping, your milk may still be there ----and
that lovely connection when you return.

Have a good trip! I am holding my 13 3/4 mo old now! So sweet an age!

I know that this sounds selfish, but I'd like to take this trip without DS. I feel like I've been baby 24/7 for 10.5 months (plus pregnancy). I don't feel yet, but I don't want to feel resentful. I'd really like to take this trip for me. My best friend lives on the opposite coast, and we'll be hanging out together.

My BF and I live together, so when I go, yes, DS will be in the same house with a consistent caregiver. But BF does not spend 4 hours a DAY with him (alone), it's more like MAYBE 4 hours a week. DS sees my mom about once a week (give and take sometimes), but we've got different ideas about how to raise children. As far as nighttime parenting, the three of us sleep together, but BF hasn't really participated in getting him to sleep (although he's done it for naps while I've taken my short breaks). BF has a different way of soothing, but LO will take it, just not as quickly or easily as with me and nursing.

I forgot to mention, DS really fit all of the High Needs Baby descriptions when I read the book. Now that he's a little older, he's better, but he really likes knowing that I'm right there.

I know that he may not need my milk, although I believe he will, and I most certainly will pump while I'm away, I definitely am not using this trip as a means to wean. I'm guessing we'll have at least a week of pretty constant nursing when I get back, and I'm not only prepared for it, but expect it and will be happy knowing that he needs me.

it sounds like you really need a break. do you get much time to yourself? would your mom or BF be able to take him so you can go out for an hour? or take a long, hot bath? go for a walk? if you do this on a more regular basis, say, once a week(or whatever is right for you), you probably won't feel the need to get away, and will return refreshed and energized.