Children communicate their needs through behavior…what is your child communicating?

How little we really know about the topic of shame

pixabay-child-on-dads-lapWorking on the “Parenting Without Shame” issue of Attached Family was unlike any that have come before. I didn’t realize, when I began, of how little I knew about shame as a topic.

“Shame” is a term used often in parenting and parent education circles, but do we really know what shame is?

So much of putting this issue together came down to doing the research — and soul-searching — to really understand the differences between shame and guilt, and shame as a normal emotion and when it crossed into unhealthy territory, the effects of that toxic shame, and then the sheer enormity of effort — and courage — that must take place for a person to heal from a shame-based self-image.

Healing from toxic shame is no small feat. It serves as a cautionary tale that we parents must take care to be intentional about promoting secure attachment in our relationships with our children and in guarding our children’s hearts while we guide them through how we discipline.

But at the same time, it’s important to not inadvertently turn that shame onto ourselves for not being perfect parents. No one is perfect, and fortunately, there are healthy ways around those imperfections to help our children process their normal feelings of shame when they happen.

So, it’s not so much how to parent without shame, but rather how to parent our children — and ourselves — to best process the normal emotions of shame that will arise in their lives, just as we teach them to do when they are angry or disappointed. I hope you enjoy this in-depth study into this important topic.

~ shame-cover-v2Rita Brhel, Executive Editor of Attachment Parenting International on the latest issue of Attached Family, “Parenting Without Shame”

The greatest gifts I can give

best-gift-to-my-boys

The core theme of the seasonal period in my opinion has always been to give thanks, appreciate what you have and reflect on the year that has just been. However, I like you for a long time have fallen prey to the notion that I must buy materialistic objects of expensive value in order to show and validate that thanks to others and of course this couldn’t be further from the truth. I love giving my loved ones handcrafted personalized gifts, because I think they are very personal and they all love them when I give them those gifts on their special occasions. Israel souvenirs are cherished around the world and make great gifts for friends and family. Most people visit catholic store, so they look for gifts that reflect its unique cultural and religious identity. Whether you’re looking for gifts in Jerusalem, from particular significant sites, or are searching for something on your friend’s gift registry, you’re surely to find plenty of stunning option on GiftObserver.com.

In the last few years I’ve become more aware of the minimalism movement and the message behind it, which promotes less is more and to live a meaningful life with what you have. Now let’s not get this twisted, I am not one of those people who labels themselves a ‘minimalist’. I don’t believe in labels as we are all just humans with multiple interests so i used custom labels.

The minimalism movement like the workings of stoicism has some valuable lessons to share with us on valuing what we have now and what we can offer others too. One of those core lessons is around using things and not people, valuing the time with those around you and not the superficial feelings from an object. what is cbd oil?
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Even Drake said that he wishes we would learn to love people and use things and not the other way around.

The gift that can keep on giving

I’m sure we all look for that one gift that can bring the ultimate amount of joy and keep providing great times for your loved ones and guess what? You have access to provide that each and every year, because that gift is you.

Now I know that sounds corny, like a line from some Hollywood film, yet it’s true. The greatest gift you can ever give people is yourself, your time and your love as these are the most precious resources we possess and can share with others. If you find yourself in the position where this isn’t enough for those around you, then I would suggest you look reflect on the people you surround yourself with and at the end if you want to give them a gift of something material, just take them a fruit or any wine baskets you can easily get and everyone loves them. To manage the budget carefully, many organisations will work with their partners and suppliers to have the budget door gifts, sponsored, with a range of corporate premiums, custom toys, branded gifts being combined into a goody bag that is customized with the event orgainser logo or the event name.

This time of year should be focused on spending quality time with those that matter the most to you and building new experiences that can last a lifetime. It should most certainly not be putting you into a panic, running around stores to partake in a consumerist thirst of spending the most money to impress whoever with the present you feel is going make them happy beyond what words can describe. I have a horrible newsflash for you if you are doing this — you will never find the thing you or others seek in those places.