May 2011

This week on The Attached Family

May 31, 2011

The Importance of Making Mistakes So often, as parents, we try to prevent our kids from making mistakes. We issue warnings, reach out to help, or just do a job ourselves because we don’t want the hassle of fixing a mistake like a spill, fall, or ill-thought decision. But making mistakes is valuable and necessary [...]

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Children Talking to Adults

May 30, 2011

My two and a half year old Jacob is very friendly. It could be because he’s my second child, and so he has benefited from my more relaxed parenting this time around as well as being doted on by his adoring older sister. It could be because he’s a Leo, the sign of nobility. It [...]

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The Use — and Abuse — of Attachment Research in Family Courts

May 23, 2011

An enormous amount of exceedingly important, valid, and reliable research on child development has been published in the last half century. Unfortunately, very little of this information has been presented in an appropriate and useful manner to the pediatricians, family therapists, parents, judges, and attorneys who could benefit from it. As a result, many children [...]

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The 3rd Step in Responding with Sensitivity

May 20, 2011

Whatever their age, every interaction with our children — every word, every response, every look — has the potential to build up their self-confidence and self-esteem, or tear it down. Likewise, every behavior of our own in which we model self-confidence, respectful self-expression, and responsible self-care and self-advocacy has the power to encourage and build [...]

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A Look at Your Discipline Style

May 19, 2011

I lead a meeting for the S. Austin Attachment Parenting chapter this morning on finding your discipline style. So often parents talk about what they don’t want to do: spank, shame, do what their parents did, etc. Figuring out what they do want to do is harder, especially when they didn’t have good models. Before [...]

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In a strange land…

May 17, 2011

Imagine you’ve just had some dental work done. Your deadened nerves make your mouth droop on one side. You’re drooling, but you don’t know you’re drooling because you can’t feel your face. Your tongue feels like it doesn’t quite fit in your mouth. And then, the phone rings. Someone’s calling about that job you’ve had [...]

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I am not raising obedient children…

May 13, 2011

…nor do I want to.  Not that I would rather have disobedient kids, but actually…that’s closer to the truth.  What? (You say.)  What crazy parent would want this? To me, the word “obedient” has such a negative connotation when used in reference to raising children; it literally means to obey.  As in, orders.  Is that what [...]

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What Are You Eating?

May 12, 2011

I have recently spent some time working at a whole foods co-op. This is supposedly a “health food” store. No additives in foods. Less sugar. You know… healthy. What I have been surprised to find is that half of the store is taken up with chips, soda and dips. A large section is dedicated to [...]

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