Daddy and Me

by Jasmine Carlson on March 12, 2010

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Sometimes I feel bad for my husband. He is a great guy and has been an awesome father. He was with me at every prenatal visit and right by my side throughout my labor. He cut our son’s chord as his eyes filled with tears. He was the one who walked our n503414499_482527_5780son all night long for the first two nights of our son’s life as he cried with colic. He helped my change my clothes and even took care of my postpartum pads. So now when my son cries when his daddy takes him or yells “NO” at him and reaches for me I feel a little sad. I know it is just a stage. I know that I am the “favorite” at the moment because my son and I spend all day every day together. Because I breastfed and have been up with him most of his other waking nights since Daddy went back to work. I can sometimes see a little pain in my husband’s eyes when our son refuses to go to him willingly and instead clings to me. Sometimes I have to force myself not to explain to him that this is “just a stage” once again. That doesn’t help. He isn’t looking for an explanation. His brain already knows; it’s just that sometimes his heart doesn’t remember.

I have noticed a few things about father/son time though. I step in too often. I tend to think since I am here all of the time that daddy needs to do things the way mommy does them and I am seeing that that is just not the case. I need to move over and make room for the relationship that they are developing, the one that I am not a part in. I need to remember that sometimes daddy knows best because he too invested the time to become firmly attached to our son. Now they have to figure out how to work out the kinks in their relationship and as they do they will learn more about each other and grow even closer together. As I have let go more and more and backed up and encouraged my husband in his relationship with our son I have seen some wonderful n503414499_496831_1822things start to happen. Daddy got him to start using the potty. Daddy is the one he wants to read him books. My son asks for daddy every day. They take naps together. They wrestle. They eat sweets and think that they “get away with it” because mommy didn’t find out.

I love my boys and look forward to seeing my son grow in to a wonderful man like his daddy.

Jasmine is a co-housing community living mama with a passion for fierce writing. She blogs.

(These are all photos my hubby and our son as a newborn and at a few weeks old. Our son is now 20 months old.)

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Jasmine Carlson (50 Posts)

Jasmine is a community living mama with a passion for fierce writing and fitness. She her way on Team USA by fitness coaching. Shaping Her. (www.shapingher.com) Join the conversation at (www.facebook.com/ShapingHer)


{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }

Smitha March 12, 2010 at 8:21 am

You spoke my heart… Word to word . I have a similar bonding story which my daughter and my Hubby share.. They are the best pals . I feel proud and blessed and yet my daughter says that I am her fav person in the whole wide world.. She is six and hopefully tell him someday that he is a very special person!

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MamanADroit March 14, 2010 at 1:21 pm

Baby is almost 8 months old and definitely has a special relationship with his Daddy. We are actually have some issues with it because Baby can’t fall asleep when Daddy is in the room ’cause it is just too darn exciting! This obviously complicates co-sleeping (we get around it by having Daddy brush his teeth etc. while Baby nurses to sleep). After Daddy leaves for the day, Baby crawls repeatedly to the door almost like he is trying to follow, and won’t stop until I find a really good distraction, like
nursing or playing with the phone.

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Seraphim November 23, 2010 at 10:32 am

So insightful and so true.
Watching my daughter with her Dada is THE most beautiful thing on the planet. He’s encouraged her in so many additional ways I couldn’t have, and it’s him she looks to when she does something new and clever.
Women are amazing creatures, but Mothers who undermine Fathers are only undermining their children.

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