Self-Pity and Me.

by Jasmine Carlson on November 27, 2009

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This past week has been something of a challenge as mini-man and I try to recuperate from our Texas trip; now we have been joined by this lovely long-lasting cold. We are both miserable.

Yesterday was one of those days where I was looking fondly back on the time when I could be sick by myself, where I could take a long shower, sleep until I couldn’t sleep any more, rest, read a book, maybe watch a movie. And I could do all this alone. Instead I am wiping snot off a clingy child while trying to change another blow-out diaper as he sobs hysterically because… I don’t know.

My poor hubby bore the brunt of my day when he arrived home as he wanted to hug me and I wanted nothing to do with being clung to.

By the end of the evening I was in such a self-pitying mood and the question that kept running through my head is “Where is the me time in all of this? When do my needs get taken care of?” And then it hit me. Well, it didn’t actually hit me, it came to me more like a rising awareness, softly whispering in to my subconscious mind. I had been taken care of! You see, I was raised in an attachment parenting home, I have been well cared for and nourished in every way in my life and now it is from that well of love, affirmation, and care that I am reaching out to take care of my child. I was cared for when I was sick, I was snuggled, fed comfort foods, and bathed. I don’t ever remember feeling like an inconvenience though I am sure that just like my son I was trying at times.

I had me time and it was good. Now it is time for me to dig in to that well-nourished (physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually) child I have in me and give unreservedly to my own child Me.

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Jasmine Carlson (50 Posts)

Jasmine is a community living mama with a passion for fierce writing and fitness. She her way on Team USA by fitness coaching. Shaping Her. (www.shapingher.com) Join the conversation at (www.facebook.com/ShapingHer)


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