Comments on: A working mom seeks balance

By: Madness of Motherhood? | Now What? Blog

Madness of Motherhood? | Now What? Blog — Sat, 13 Nov 2010 22:28:05 +0000

[...] to Jong’s claim that AP does not account for, or address, the challenges busy families and working mothers face, a key goal of attachment parenting is supporting working mothers in their efforts to create [...]

By: Jennifer

Jennifer — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 03:47:37 +0000

I am a single mom and self-employed. I found AP the natural way. I was all ready to do it like all the mother’s were telling me and when my daughter was born….instinct kicked in and I found out a couple months later that there was actually a name for this this. I am a hairdresser and once in awhile I get someone who thinks that AP is “un-healthy” and “not fair to the child”. It’s so frustrating! I have a very well balanced, happy daughter and that’s proof that this is right for us. It’s nice to see that others have the same struggles with balancing housework and time with kids and work. I am lucky enough to be able to make my own hours to suit my daughters schedule. Summer is hard as she is in school during the year and child care is “iffy”! I get family and friends to agree to have her “visit” for a week here and a week there and Grandmother comes to help us out for awhile. I recently quit working evenings so that I could give my daughter some sort of routine at night and it was the most wonderful thing I have ever done. I love the time with her. She still sleeps with me. It just seems silly to have her way across the house when it’s just the two of us. She will want her independence soon enough!

By: Allison

Allison — Sat, 06 Jun 2009 12:03:16 +0000

I work full-time but I have a flexible schedule where I work four longer 9 hour days and one half day. I also work from home 2 out of 5 days and my 1 year-old son only has to be in daycare 4 days a week. My husband has a flexible schedule as well which allows him to be home in the mornings with our son, taking him to the childminder around 9:30. I try to leave work at work when I am done and to be present with my family when we are together. I get my “me” time in the evening when I breastfeed my son down to sleep in the family bed I read a book (something I could not give up!). I usually stay in bed from 8:30 when he goes to sleep and read for an hour or so, this is much needed downtime for me.

By: Christian AP Mama

Christian AP Mama — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 21:44:08 +0000

Like you, I quit my full-time job as a newspaper editor to take writing/editing contracts from a home office. At first, it was a little difficult learning how to balance everything, but I’m getting better all the time. The key, I think, is to always be looking for a solution…if you feel guilty about something, to think of a way to alleviate the problem and and try it and see if it works. If it doesn’t work, try something else.

For the first nine months after my first child was born, I worked full-time from home as a freelance writer and my husband worked part-time telemarketing during the evening shift, so there was always someone home and able to give our daughter plenty of attention…even if I had to hit the road for an assignment. When my oldest was 9 months, we moved and transitioned to more traditional roles — my husband working full-time for a factory during the day and I working from home (20-30 hours a week). This has been more challenging for me, as I now have to do more work after everyone goes to bed, instead of getting sleep myself.

What I’ve done is to set up my “office” (really a desk with a computer and some shelves on the wall for files, etc.) in the living room where my children spend the day playing. This way, I’m always right here when one of them need me. I’ve had to get used to tuning out noises (and the TV, when my husband is home) when I work, as I formerly needed it to be dead quiet to work. And I’ve learned how to cram a lot of work in a short time and still have it come out as quality work. Again, seeing what works and trying to problem-solve for solutions when I encounter something that doesn’t work.

Like you, I sometimes think that maybe I’m not giving my kids my everything by working from home, that I’d have more to give if I didn’t work at all. And the truth is, yes, I would be able to give more of me if I didn’t work — but I wouldn’t be nearly as happy as I am now, because I love my work. And being a happy person translates into being a happy mother.

It really does work very well for me to do my work in the same room as where my children work — and allowing them to distract me without me.

By: Jess

Jess — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 17:49:07 +0000

Thank-you for sharing this. I stay at home full-time and still struggle with guilt that I’m not doing enough . . . it is good to hear that balance is the key, and imperfection is ok!